The Prodigal Dad


I was recently with a father who has been through the ringer with his son over the past few years. Suffice it to say that he has run into the wall just beyond the line of God’s sovereign will and the common grace of parenting. Or perhaps more illustrative, he’s living in the tension of “you can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make him drink.”

This man is a great dad. His heart’s desire is that all of his children would, like the apostle Paul, “be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which comes through faith in Christ, the righteousness from God that depends on faith.” (Philippians 3:9 ESV)

As we discussed God’s sovereignty, man’s depravity, and the life lessons therein, I was reminded about something my own dad has always told me. “Never be afraid to come home.”

Six simple words that meant so much more. They meant that I will always have a home under my father’s roof. They meant that my dad would be the first person I call (save perhaps my wife nowadays) if I found myself in real trouble. They meant that there is literally nothing I could do to lose my right to be a part of my father’s family. I always knew this. And so do the kids of my friend above.

But as I drove away from our meeting, a distant realization caught up with me all too quickly. It was as if I had walked out my front door into a maelstrom of reality dragging me deeper into its grasp. You see, as I have often written about, I have a great dad. And my friend is a great dad. But many in our own church cannot say the same thing.

The fatherhood deficiency in American society is nothing new. In fact, the worldwide phenomenon has been pandemic for years. I was recently in Nicaragua. They have the same problem. I’ve been to 3 or 4 other Latin American nations that are in the same boat. It’s not a new thing.

But the striking reality is this. As the trend grows, fewer and fewer children will hear the words “Never be afraid to come home.”

Now, why are those words so important?

Because of all the things they tell us. “Never be afraid to come home” is a clear picture of the reality that God searches for his prodigal children. It’s the declaration that there is literally nothing a child of God can do to lose the right to be called his son or daughter. It means that, for the Christian, our first response when we sin is to run to our Father, rather than away from him. And that is a true mark of maturity.

But I’m fearful that without our earthly dads to tell us that, we will have a difficult time learning it about our Heavenly Father. My dad–his actions, his love, and his words–were instrumental in my regeneration experience. And what’s more, my dad was a father figure for some of my closest friends when we all lived in a house together. They may not have called him dad. But a good father is a father in the same way a good athlete is an athlete. It just comes natural.

Don’t think that I’m attempting to take the supernatural away from God, as if he couldn’t possibly regenerate hearts to faith without the example of good earthly fathers. The truth is, God has ordained fatherhood to be a vivid illustration of his relationship to us. Why else would he call us sons and daughters?  So, for Christian fathers, the office of fatherhood carries a grace-filled weight that is unlike any other office that men can occupy.

But the problem is we have too many prodigal dads. Fulfilling their own destinies through achievement. Chasing a different woman every night at the local dive bar to escape chronic loneliness. Exploring “feminization” and “metrosexuality” simply because they are the latest trends on their news feeds. Searching for the kind of identity that is only to be found within the scope of God’s good design.

So, this is a plea to the prodigal dads. It’s not too late. My dad’s not perfect. Far from it. But he was, is, and will always be–first and foremost–my dad.

If God can heal the most fractured relationship that has ever existed–the one between you and him–he can surely reconcile your relationship with your wife and kids by his grace. He can certainly bring you under the fountain of joy that comes from renewal in Him. He can put you back together.

Prodigal dad, “Never be afraid to come home.”

Soli Deo Gloria

The Depth of Meaning


Modern culture is great at a few things which past cultures simply could not do. Communication, for example, is faster, broader, more convenient, and less of a hassle than it was during, let’s say, early colonial America. I mean, let’s face it. In our time, Paul Revere would not have had to expend all the energy to ride through the town and shout “The British are coming!” He could have just tweeted it— though history might not have been quite as faithful to the dramatic nature of the event. Imagine the scope of the first Thanksgiving if the Pilgrims had been able to send out an e-vite. And I suspect the Puritans would have appreciated having access to the Blogosphere, as they sought to extinguish the last bastions of Roman Catholic practices in English and American Christianity.

But, alas, for all the progress in the areas of technology, communication, and more, you and I must admit that we’ve taken a few giant steps back in more than one arena.

Here’s one that irks me. Our culture has hijacked and diluted the meaning of words. Think about it. In 2013, the Oxford English Dictionary formally added the word “selfie” to our lexicon. That’s right. You and I live in a culture that has made “selfie” an official word.

Can you imagine some of the great men and women of years’ past taking a “selfie?” John Hancock—with his iPhone in one hand and his pen in the other as he awkwardly snaps a photo of the signing of the Declaration of Independence? Betsy Ross—with the newly sown American flag draped over her shoulders, the caption simply reading “…’Merica.”

One of the most abused and misunderstood groups of words within our culture is that which revolves around the ideas of feeling, emotion, and affection. For us, the word “feeling” has come to mean a whimsical sensuality, which is wholly based on circumstantial, temporal pleasure. It is immensely subjective and totally contingent upon the prevalent whims of the individual.

And yet, there was a time when the ideas of feeling, emotion, and particularly affection, stood for something much deeper. Jonathan Edwards, the 18th century leader of the Great Awakening, wrote “The will, and the affections of the soul, are not two faculties: the affections are not essentially distinct from the will, nor do that differ from the mere actings of the will, but only in the liveliness and sensibility of exercise.”[1] In other words, according to Edwards, the affections are “the sensed or felt exercises of the will.”[2] Now, that definition certainly runs much deeper than our modern understanding.

Let me give you an illustration. The kind of affection which Edwards described is in fact what drives the Christian pursuit of God. But what kind of pursuit is this?

 It is not the kind of response that a young girl would have at catching the eye of a boy in her class. Her heart would flutter; she might giggle and recount the story to her friends. But almost all young girls (no offense) are fickle. She would eventually become bored or smitten with the new boy in class. That is not the kind of response the gospel of new life elicits.

No, the kind of response the gospel evokes is like that of a bride who sees her husband laboring in the yard, earning at the marketplace, playing with his children, dancing with her at a party, and kissing her goodnight. She watches this faithful man as he pours himself out for his family, and she cannot help but love him for it. He asks for nothing in return, but she cannot hold back her expression of love in light of his sacrifice. She is compelled, by his selfless love, to live out her love for him. This is the love of a Christian for his Savior.[3]

This kind of feeling is driven by a deep, heart-felt gratitude for the redeeming work of Christ. It is sustained by a perpetual sense of one’s neediness before an all-sufficient God. It is a continual confession of a kind of thirst which can only be satisfied by eternal streams of glory.

At least, that’s how David and the other men who penned the Psalms saw it.

 As a deer pants for flowing streams,
so pants my soul for you, O God.
My soul thirsts for God,
for the living God.
(Psalm 42:1)

O God, you are my God; earnestly I seek you;
my soul thirsts for you;
my flesh faints for you,
as in a dry and weary land where there is no water.
(Psalm 63:1)

 My soul will be satisfied as with fat and rich food,
and my mouth will praise you with joyful lips,
when I remember you upon my bed,
and meditate on you in the watches of the night;
(Psalm 63:5-6)

We even see this sort of poetic expression throughout the deeply theological writings of Paul, as if after long stretches of theological reflection, the natural overflow of his heart is joy-filled worship. One can hardly read through Philippians 2 and not feel the depths of Christology stirring the affections of the heart.

And so, I implore you to dig deeper. Look beyond the surface-level meanings of words that have been hijacked by our skin-deep culture. Search the Scriptures and seek the depths of such words. Journey back through the annals of Church History and read the writings of the Patristics, the Reformers, the Puritans, and more. Think deeply, that you may deeply worship a God in whom there is no end of depth.

Soli Deo Gloria

[1] Jonathan Edwards, Treatise Concerning the Religious Affections.

[2] Ibid.

[3] The previous two paragraphs were taken from my new book, Gospel Regeneration, available now at Amazon and other retailers.

Biblical Counseling for All


Let me begin this post by confessing that I’m not an expert at anything (which you hopefully already know). But one of the things I’ve seen, particularly pastoring teens, is that there is so much ambiguity around the idea of biblical counseling. And typically, when we hear the words “Biblical Counselor,” our antenna shoots up, as if there’s some major issue that the “regular” community is not equipped to address. In that moment, we can tend to tune out, turn off, and just think “I’ll let the experts do their job.”

And praise God for the experts. In our small town, I’ve heard of several great professionals who counsel from a biblical perspective. My office sits in between two of the best biblical counselors I’ve ever met! So, I’m certainly not downplaying the need for skilled, knowledgeable, godly men and women who are able to use God’s word to skillfully point people to their ultimate need. 

But, Christians, let’s be honest. We know we’re all supposed to be biblical counselors. Let me give you a few simple commands from Scripture that’ll catch all of us.

But exhort one another every day, as long as it is called “today,” that none of you may be hardened by the deceitfulness of sin. (Hebrews 3:13 ESV)

And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. And be thankful. Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, with thankfulness in your hearts to God. (Colossians 3:15-16 ESV)

But we do not want you to be uninformed, brothers, about those who are asleep, that you may not grieve as others do who have no hope…

…Therefore encourage one another with these words.

(1 Thessalonians 4:13, 18 ESV)

OK, so now that we’re all under the umbrella of these “one another” commands, let’s dispel some of the false notions about biblical counseling.

What it’s not

1. Biblical counseling is not merely an academic discipline. Hear me, while men and women study and train in this arena (and praise God for that), those who go into the field know that biblical counseling is intensely personal, emotional, and relational. How can you counsel some one you don’t know? How can you exhort some one as a brother or sister if there’s no relationship there? It’s nearly impossible. The best biblical counselors are those who take time to simply get to know people. 

2. Biblical counseling is not “therapy,” at least in the common sense of the word. When you hear some one say, “I’m going to see my therapist,” what kinds of images flood your mind? Are they taking crazy pills? Are they getting hypnotized? Are they dependent on this person to help them get through the week? Once again, I do not seek to demean the profession itself, but rather to expose the common misconceptions. You see, the underlying principle for biblical counseling is the radical notion that only God is in control. We become totally dependent on Him, not on our counselor (as any good biblical counselor will point out).

3. Finally, biblical counseling is not only what happens for an hour after church in the pastor’s office (though this pastoral function is so vital for the church). That begs us to look at what biblical counseling actually is.

What it is

1. First and foremost, biblical counseling is biblical. In Colossians 3, Paul tells the church how it’s supposed to function. He tells them that the Word of God is supposed to dwell in you richly. This isn’t some perfunctory knowledge of the Word which is attained by a 5 minute “Quiet Time” each morning. This is a deep, heart-level, knowledge of and passion for God’s Word. It is an understanding of the overarching story line of the Bible, the gospel. It is a faithful approach to biblical interpretation and a Spirit-wrought understanding of its application to all of life.

And this kind of passion for the Scriptures should be a consistent pursuit for all Christians. We’re all over the spectrum with regard to how deeply we’ve probed the waters of God’s inexhaustible riches found in the Scripture. But there’s one commonality for those whose hearts have been captured by Christ: we’re all swimming in his Word

2. Next, biblical counseling is gospel-centered. As mentioned above, the Christian should have a knowledge of, and a love for, the great story line of the Bible. Creation. Fall. Redemption. Consummation. These are the four big acts. They make sense of the stories within the story. They make sense of all of our stories.

Matt Chandler, in The Explicit Gospel, calls the approach above “the gospel in the air.” But biblical counseling must also consider what he calls “the gospel on the ground.” This is the up-close-and-personal approach to understanding the gospel. Every man is sinful, and this sin causes separation from a holy God. Jesus entered into our reality in order to bring reconciliation. He imputes to us his righteousness, and he took on God’s wrath toward our sin. And because of his glorious resurrection, we are assured that he’ll one day raise and renew our bodies to be like his resurrected body. This gospel-centered approach to counseling is so vital, as the gospel is the only cure for the great sickness of man.

3. Finally, and so often missed, biblical counseling is a community project. As mentioned above, it is not merely what happens in the pastor’s office or on the time clock of a professional. Though both of these professions are necessary, Christians cannot be satisfied with just referring our brothers and sisters to a professional without first entering into their struggles, as Christ entered into ours.

I’m not saying you have to be fully equipped to deal with some of the deepest hurts of the human heart, but I’m also saying that the Bible says you should be somewhat equipped.

Who are the people you live closely with? Do they come to you for advice? If so, you have already been a biblical counselor (whether a good one or a bad one). Unless you’re just too young, you’ve probably already had the opportunity to comfort some one in the face of death, loss, illness, and more. Hear me…what you say (or even don’t say) in those moments is actually biblical counseling.

So, to wrap up, let me give you a few thoughts to hide away for those critical moments.

1. Paul told the Corinthians that something unique happens when you become a part of a church. You become a part of a body. And when one part of your body hurts, your whole body hurts. 

If one member suffers, all suffer together; if one member is honored, all rejoice together.
(1 Corinthians 12:26 ESV)

So, when your brothers and sisters come to you in confidence with their deepest hurts, you should hurt with them. I’m not saying you feel their hurt as deeply. What I’m saying is that their hurt should hurt you. This only happens in relationship. If you think you can skate through the Christian life without close, intimate relationships with your brothers and sisters, you are missing out on one of the best gifts of God.

Sometimes, in those most profound moments, the best thing you can do is mourn with some one. That’s biblical. 

2. Gospel-centered is really not just a catch-phrase. Every single time you have a chance to counsel or advise some one, ask yourself, “How does the gospel bear weight on this situation?”

Let me give you an example. If you are counseling some one who is dealing with anger at a past abuse, holding a grudge, or feeling like they’ve been unjustly wronged, consider Romans 5. 

For one will scarcely die for a righteous person—though perhaps for a good person one would dare even to die—but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us. Since, therefore, we have now been justified by his blood, much more shall we be saved by him from the wrath of God. For if while we were enemies we were reconciled to God by the death of his Son, much more, now that we are reconciled, shall we be saved by his life. More than that, we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation. (Romans 5:7-11 ESV)

You see, God is the ultimate example of being unjustly wronged. He is holy, blameless, and perfect. He is the Creator. And yet we, the creation, have blatantly disregarded him. If Christ died for us when we were hostile to him, how much more should we live our lives with a posture of forgiveness toward those who have wronged us?

Clearly, this is just one example, but the point is to think critically about how the gospel applies to every situation. 

3. Finally, when counseling some one facing death, or the loss of a loved-one, consider the eschatological implications. I’m not talking about whether you’re pre-mil, a-mil, post-mil, or any-other-mil. What I’m saying is that death is the separation of the body from the spirit. That’s not how God created things to be, and that’s why death is such a formidable enemy. 

But, we have this promise in Scripture.

But our citizenship is in heaven, and from it we await a Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ, who will transform our lowly body to be like his glorious body, by the power that enables him even to subject all things to himself. (Philippians 3:20-21 ESV)

This means that, though creation is now subject to things like cancer, decay, and death, there will be a day in which death will be totally destroyed. And those who believe in Christ will be raised anew, with glorified bodies that are totally sinless and totally able to enjoy fellowship with God, needing nothing else for all eternity. This is all because of the life, death, and glorious resurrection of Christ. 

And I could write so much more about how the grand story of the gospel applies to counseling. But the point is to get you thinking. Who are those people in your life who need to hear you speak these truths? Before you shrug and refer them to a professional, what biblical truths can you convey that will point to the problem (sin) and then to the cure (Christ)? 

After all, biblical counseling is a community project.


Soli Deo Gloria.

Book Excerpt: Born Again to a Living Hope

The following is an excerpt from my new book Gospel Regeneration. You can now buy the book on and Keep in mind that 50% of the profits will go directly to Acts 29 Network to support church planting efforts across the globe. 

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus
Christ! According to his great mercy, he has caused
us to be born again to a living hope through the
resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, to an
inheritance that is imperishable, undefiled, and
unfading, kept in heaven for you, who by God’s
power are being guarded through faith for a
salvation ready to be revealed in the last time. In
this you rejoice, though now for a little while, if
necessary, you have been grieved by various trials,
so that the tested genuineness of your faith—more
precious than gold that perishes though it is tested
by fire—may be found to result in praise and glory
and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ. Though
you have not seen him, you love him. Though you
do not now see him, you believe in him and rejoice
with joy that is inexpressible and filled with glory,
obtaining the outcome of your faith, the salvation
of your souls. (1 Peter 1:3-9)

What a beautiful passage describing the regenerative hope that God grants to His chosen. We are born again (regenerated) to a kind of hope that is alive! How glorious! The new hope which is granted by God in Christ is filled with, well…life. Living hope.

That hope is made possible through the resurrection of Christ. Because He was made alive, our hope is kept alive. And the full realization of that hope will not be revealed to us until “the last time.” This means that, even in the midst of trials, we hold on to the hope, the belief, the reality, that there is a coming light that far outshines the darkness.

And what’s more, the endurance of such trials actually produces a genuine stamp on our regenerate life. In other words, you can take literally everything from a regenerate person, except this: the expectant hope of the future. You can torture him, rob him, ridicule him, and even kill him. None of this will remove his hope in the outcome of his faith, the salvation of his soul! Why is this true? Because of the whole scope of regeneration! If God is the one who does it, God is the one who will complete it. No man can take away a hope that was implanted at regeneration by God. It is a living hope. It will not be killed. It will, by the power of God, be fulfilled upon the return of Jesus Christ.

I think Tolkien may have taken his cues from the Apostle Paul when he wrote of Sam Gamgee’s resolve. Paul, a man who suffered deeply, once wrote, “For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us” (Romans 8:18). He was peering out over the darkness in search of the bright light of God’s glory which would be fully revealed to him at some point in the future. He looked around and saw that even if there was beauty to be had, it was only a shadow. He saw the futility of sin and death manifested throughout all of creation, and he longed for the day all would be set right. So it was in this kind of hope that Paul found the confidence to endure beatings, shipwrecks, prison stays, the loss of his idols, and much more.

Paul lived his life in such a way that the hope of the future sustained him in the midst of present discomfort. He called his intense suffering “light and momentary” compared to the weight of future glory. He eagerly anticipated the moment when his body would no longer be subject to sin and decay.  He was driven by his deepest desire, to be with Christ—to finally be made whole in him. That is a living hope.

Soli Deo Gloria

Preschool and Total Depravity

My wife has the hardest job in the world. Seriously, I have worked in the construction industry, enduring long days working on rooftops through the Texas summer. I’ve worked for a mortgage company, where I had to make phone calls to people who were late on their payments. I worked for a non-profit relief agency and saw children roaming the streets of Mexico City shoe-less and orphaned. And now I work for a church, where I see stories of brokenness due to the effects of sin. But her job is tougher than any of that. What does she do? She’s a preschool teacher.

And what’s crazy about that is…she absolutely loves it. For about a year now, I’ve come home to hear stories about children running wild, peeing their pants, puking in her hair, licking (yes, licking) her leg, and much more! And, on the whole, she loves it. Honestly, I try not to picture it too vividly because I’m fearful I’d begin to have recurring nightmares.

We live in a pretty good town, but one of the sad realities that is indicative of our culture at large is that many of these preschool kids– 3 and 4 year olds– come from broken homes. My wife has met grandparents, aunts, uncles, and all kinds of other guardians who are trying to raise multiple children on their own. When she was planning out her crafts for the week of Father’s Day, she was confronted with the sad reality that about half of her kids did not have their dad at home.

Because her school is open year-round, they promote children to the next grade at the beginning of summer. That means that my wife has just gotten a round of brand new 3 year olds. That’s right…these kids were recently 2. Barely potty trained, and hardly able to communicate, they come into an organized classroom setting for the first time in their lives, and my wife is the one who has to teach them how to behave. Tell me your job is tough…

The beginning of this summer has been pretty tough for our family. Various family members battling cancer and a host of dog problems have kind of left us in a discouraged, beaten-down kind of place. On top of that, my wife has just gotten a new group of preschoolers who are particularly rowdy. And there’s this one kid….

I don’t know his whole story. It’s a broken home type thing. Dad is probably gone, and Mom is not the easiest person to communicate with. Every single day this 3 year old boy soils his pant. No diapers, no pull-ups, just soiled underwear. AND, what’s worse is that the “backup pair” every parent is supposed to leave at the school is also soiled. Gross.

So, every day this kid has the same problem. And every single day, my wife takes him to the restroom, cleans him up, and brings him back to the rest of the class. Sometimes she does this multiple times each day. At the beginning, we kept hoping each morning that she’d have a poop-less day. Now, we’re beginning to lose hope. But my wife persists.

I’m not saying she enjoys it. I’m not saying she doesn’t dread the times he runs full-force toward her and jumps in her lap (who knows what’s in the shorts). But I’m not sure I’ve ever seen a more consistent and tangible display of selfless love as the one I’ve experienced through watching my wife love this kid over the past few weeks. Every day she is there. Every day, she cleans him up– knowing she will have to do it again tomorrow.

I’m so struck by the gospel implications that are bursting out of this beautiful metaphor. Don’t you see it? You and I are the kid with the soiled pants. Day after day, we mess up. We are untrained, incapable of stopping ourselves from the urge to sin. We are totally depraved, unable to clean ourselves up in order to present ourselves before God unstained.

But Jesus stepped into our mess. He became one of us, identifying with our greatest fears and our futile striving. He left his seat in the throne room of Heaven and came to dwell in this dark, dirty, and idolatrous world.

Not only that, but he took on our mess. He bore our sins on the cross. Though he lived a perfect, sinless life, he was punished as if he lived my messed-up, sin-soaked life. He took on God’s wrath on my behalf, so that he could present me before God as holy, blameless, and clean.

Perhaps the most mind-blowing part of this is that, when Jesus went to the cross, all my sins were in the future. This mean that he knew. He knew that tomorrow, for me, would be largely the same as today. While I can certainly make progress by the Spirit, Jesus knew that I’d never be totally rid of sin until the day he calls me home.

Let that settle in. That means that he knows, even as you solemnly swear this is the last time you will give in to your lust, that you’ll do it tomorrow. Even if it’s not that particular sin. You’ll mess up again. Two times, three times, a hundred times a day. No matter how holy you become, you will still sin, and he knew it.

Set against the backdrop of total depravity, Paul exalts the gospel in 2 Corinthians 5:

For our sake he made him to be sin who knew no sin, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God. (2 Corinthians 5:21 ESV)

This is good news because it set in opposition to such bad news. Paul does the same thing in his letter to the Ephesians:

And you were dead in the trespasses and sins in which you once walked, following the course of this world, following the prince of the power of the air, the spirit that is now at work in the sons of disobedience—among whom we all once lived in the passions of our flesh, carrying out the desires of the body and the mind, and were by nature children of wrath, like the rest of mankind. But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ—by grace you have been saved  (Ephesians 2:1-5 ESV)

Cripplingly bad news, followed by blindingly good news. That’s what the gospel is. And that’s why we need it every single day.

Does such news make men lazy? If we are given over to depravity, should we even try? Paul has something to say to that too:

What shall we say then? Are we to continue in sin that grace may abound? By no means! How can we who died to sin still live in it? Do you not know that all of us who have been baptized into Christ Jesus were baptized into his death? We were buried therefore with him by baptism into death, in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, we too might walk in newness of life.
(Romans 6:1-4 ESV)

How do we walk in newness of life? By reminding ourselves (and each other) every single day that Jesus is enough. And, grace upon grace, when we forget it, God promises that His Spirit will remind us:

The Spirit himself bears witness with our spirit that we are children of God  (Romans 8:16 ESV)

Don’t you see? Total depravity means that you and I cannot take one step on our own. We need God every second of every day. We need Him when we constantly and continually give into the flesh and live as if He is not enough. And the beauty of the gospel is that, even when we struggle to believe it…Jesus is enough.

Soli Deo Gloria




Book Update

After three years of writing, editing, asking questions, re-writing chapters, working with the great people at Lucid Books, and more….the time has come!


You are looking at the first proof copy of Gospel Regeneration, which means that publication is right around the corner! Within three weeks, the book will be available on Amazon and other online retailers. I will keep you posted on how and when it becomes available.

In the meantime, feel free to help me spread the word! If you plan to read the book, let people know about it! You can use the image below on social media, etc.

3x2 Card



That’s all for now. Make sure to check back here for updates in the coming weeks!

Soli Deo Gloria